Phyllis Tarlow Fine Art - Hudson From Bear Mt
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A Guest In My Home

Sad but true, forced to rely on other people to do everything for you, completely strips you of your identity as a person in so many ways.

The first to go, modesty, it can no longer exist. Relying on someone to wipe your bottom removes all modesty immediately. Along with modesty comes shy, reserved, embarrassed as all these feeling can no longer matter (but of course they live on silently in our brains).

Organization is also gone. Once we are dependent on someone else to put things away where you keep them you might as well say goodbye to organization, especially for those of us that are Type A personalities.

I understand no one will do things 100% like I do, but that doesn’t make it easier to be forced to sit and notice things in my own home that aren’t the way I’d have it or do it.

Some people say, oh well, the person was trying to help, or oh well, it was an accident that it didn’t get put in the right spot or it got broken, or oh well, it’s not that big a deal, guess what, it is a big deal. It’s a big deal because being #paralyzed only means I can’t walk, it doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings, or a a brain or the ability to think for myself.

2 1/2 years later and I find myself able to let most of these issues go but sometimes the littlest thing will be the “straw that broke the camel’s back.” I’m sure as time continues to pass I’ll continue to learn to #let_it_go. Logically my brain says 2 1/2 years isn’t all that long a time to have passed since this tragic situation (becoming a #paraplegic). The more time that passes I’m hopeful that I’ll continue to come to grips with this new life.

As always, I wish you days filled with wonder – take a minute to wonder what it is that made you smile today!

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2 Responses to “A Guest In My Home”

  • Jo Robbins says:

    I think its crap if the person you are depending on can not or will not take care of your items as if they were their own. There is no reason to act like it means nothing, YOU must use care for things that are not yours. Judge Judy says that reasonable care is something we all are required to have with someone else stuff. An honestly you might be in the wrong line of work if you can not see that you are hurting someone by not.

  • Everyone should respect someone’s space, home and personal items. They do not belong to them they belong to you. You still have the right to run your home as you like, and have things where you want them. No one else has the right to make decisions about you or your home but you. You may be paralyzed from waist down, but you are still a whole person with wants, likes, and right to make your own choices. If you employ someone to aid you they are there because you provided their employment, there for you are their boss. If it’s family or friends, they still should ask you how you like things done, when you want things done and where you wNt things put. You are the queen of your castle . No one else is

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